Dear Life,

I don’t know why I’m writing a letter to you since you’re more or less an abstract concept that I don’t yet fully understand. It’s not everyday that I think about what I want to say to you and most of the time, I just curse your existence as I slowly trudge through a normal day’s routine.

And since I’m not very good at the whole “sentimental” thing, I’ll try keep this short and sweet so that you can go back to whatever it is that you do.

Thank you for that horrible traffic jam on the one day I was running extremely late for work, that time the air conditioning broke down on the hottest day of the year and that high school yearbook photo which made me look like I was stoned. Thank you for making me lose half my thesis paper to a thunderstorm blackout the day before it was due. Thank you for placing that hideous monstrosity of a pimple on my nose the day before my first date and that old lady who not only checks out a full shopping cart in the express lane, but also tries to pay with a jar of pennies. Thank you for having my math professor drone on an on about subjects I don’t understand or care about and the time you made me cry when my beloved dog Skipper died after picking a fight with a moving car. Thank you for the day that my parents decided to talk to me about sex. And thank you for proving to me, over and over, that you suck more than a vacuum on steroids.

Thank you for that funny snore that grandpa makes when he falls asleep watching T.V on the couch, for the silly birthday cards my friends would send me and for giving me a little brother to blame whenever I did something wrong. Thank you for the day I learned how to ride my bicycle without training wheels and the gigantic ego boost I had afterwards. Thank you for filling my childhood summers with a lazy serenity of school-less delight, chasing fields of fireflies in the dark and half melted ice-cream bars. Thank you for my first kiss. Thank you for the foot of snow that cancelled school on the day of my History exam and for letting me wake up to the smell of freshly made apple pie on Christmas Eve. And thank you for proving to me, over and over, that despite everything, you’re worth it.

Thank you for giving me my family, my friends, my home. Thank you for the laughter, the tears, the anger, the excitement, the hurt, the surprise, the pain, the joy.

Most of all, thank you for letting me live. I wouldn’t change you for the world.


With bitter sarcasm and a dash of love,
Me.

P.S. Remember that time my alarm clock didn't go off the day of my chemistry final. You know, the test that counted for half my grade and I wound up having about thirty minutes to complete what should have been a three hour exam? Yeah. I just got the results. I still passed.

IN YOUR FACE.